I have something extremely exciting that I feel like everyone should know about. Plus, it makes the perfect coffee table book! See, antennas have changed since their inception in 1698, during the end of the renaissance period. People will tell you differently, but they’re liars, every single one of them, and they don’t want you to know the true history.
So yeah, it was while before we saw the first Melbourne TV antennas. In fact, it wouldn’t get them until 1963, when the current Prime Minister signed a secret agreement with the Yakuza that were holding his daughter hostage. They refused to release their shipment of antennas OR the daughter, but an impractically muscular American man in sunglasses managed to break in with a machine gun and several grenades and punch everyone until they agreed to back off. But that’s not the story here, because the ACTUAL story is how antenna aperture actually works. Imagine having a book on your coffee table that tells people about that! These devices that sit on our roofs and bring us so much job, and people just assume they’re some kind of television-providing magic wands that steal TV from the sky and beam it to your TV. Makes me mad, bro. Makes me so very mad. So that’s why I want copies of this book on every coffee table in Melbourne, nay, Australia. They’ll all see how exciting antenna polarity and impedance matching can be. And the answer is: very exciting!
If you think about it, it’s the perfect coffee table book. An object that so many people use but know nothing about. It has its own colourful history, a fascinating function and so many different varieties. And the photos…oh boy, the photos could just be a book all by themselves. Digital Antenna Installation: The True Melbourne Story. You know you want it.
-Anton