The Mind Mechanic

Apparently, that book and movie lied: reading books does not give you telekinesis. I read so many books, and I did keep checking, but I was consistently disappointed. It wasn’t even a gradual ramping up of power, either. I thought that maybe finishing Moby Dick would give me the power to move pencils, Pride and Prejudice might advance me to shoes and towels, and by the time I’d polished off The Count of Monte Cristo I’d be tossing around cars and large boulders with my mind like they were made of polystyrene. Grabbing helicopters from the sky, all of that.

No luck. Now I have to keep going to TAFE and learning to do car air conditioning services like everyone else. For the record, even if I had developed telekinetic powers, I’d still have kept doing mechanic stuff…I’d just be doing it way cooler than everyone else. Lifting cars, fitting wheels, diagnosing problems, all using my brain. I’d be the best mechanic in Toowoomba purely on the strength of my mental powers. People would flock to me as a tourist attraction, which would be awesome for the local economy…but not anymore, because it was apparently all a lie. Lies, all of it. All those books, and I can barely even move a feather.

Maybe I should’ve been reading books about telekinesis…the knowledge entering my brain and eventually giving me the ability. But then, if that’s how things worked, I could just read a bunch of books about mechanics and they’d give me the power to control cars with my mind. And that definitely isn’t a thing, can confirm, otherwise I would’ve heard about people doing it.

I guess the only way to be a good at fixing cars is to just practice at being a mechanic. Toowoomba didn’t get its reputation from people with mechanical powers, after all. 

As for getting better at telekinesis, there IS no way. If you can’t get it from a book, you can’t get it at all.